New Powers for The brand new and Enhanced Superman!

I at times marvel on the sweetly archaic portrayal of Superman in the movies. And that i often secretly wish the New and Improved Superman had some new powers much more suitable for our working day and age plus much more in tune While using the spirit in the occasions.

Certainly, to determine with the partitions, preserving schoolchildren trapped in burning schoolbuses and stopping bullets is great, but how about these new powers?

1) The brand new and Enhanced Superman is usually a Golf Monster. He can complete an eighteen-hole golfing Match in eighteen shots flat (whack! and It truly is in). He embarrasses his prosperous nemeses each and every time, driving lousy figures like Joker to suicide.

2) Superman is a Super Working day Trader. He who is faster flash or superman helps make tens of millions in options investing every morning though taking in his Wheaties and consuming his espresso. He donates the proceeds to battle world warming and nuclear proliferation.

3) Superman is a Super Poker Bluffer (seeing the playing cards of all the other players with X-eyesight unquestionably can help). He wins the Poker Globe Championship yearly without having are unsuccessful and donates his prize money as well as the gold bracelet to Gamblers Nameless Crisis Fund.

four) Superman is an excellent Dieter. He can drop one hundred lbs in 24 hrs Every time he would like it, holding the torch of hope and inspiration higher for all dieters throughout the world.

5) Superman is a Super Recycler. He has 100 distinctive recycling bins at his household, quickly dispatching all gum wrappers, bread crumbs, unsolicited mail and supporter letters to their suitable bins.

six) Superman is a brilliant Lobbyist. He can raise resources for 1,000 causes at the same time and he can appeal to all 535 associates of the U.S. Congress within a flash and deliver shopper inputs to 1,000 piece of legislation every month.